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Light a Candle
This is a bit of a work in progress, but I wanted to start writing some thought of my dear mother who passed away peacefully last Wednesday January 18th, 2017, at her home with her husband nearby. I will be adding to it as more memories come to me.
Our Mother's American name is Shirley Cooper, while her Japanese name is Masako. After coming to America she chose the name Shirley after the popular child star, Shirley Temple. My mom was the oldest of 3 brothers: Sao, Kazuo, Mitsuo and 1 sister: Makiko and as a result grew up with a strong maternal instinct as she felt responsible for taking care of her siblings. My mom was a very selfless person, I spoke about this in her eulogy, she always put the needs of other people, especially her family, before her own needs, also she never sought or required praise from those same people. My sister and I have those same qualities, although we pale in comparison to the amount of selflessness that was exhibited by mom. She was such a wonderful Mother and we will all truly miss her. We will think about her every day of our lives.
Japanese extended Family:
Over the years we have kept in touch with Atsuko Tonoki, she is the daughter of Makiko who is my mom's sister, so Atsuko is our niece.
She is very nice and always sends us a nice Christmas card and she speaks and writes english very well. I remember going to the zoo with her in Japan when I was little. My mom's relatives visited us in the 1980's, it was mom's brother Mistsuo, his wife Sumiko and Sumiko's mom. They celebrated my Dad and Mitsuo's birthday's, so it was January. My mom was very happy to have her family visit.
Also about 1997 Atsuko visited Sandra and I in Folsom. She was just there for a few hours, but we were very happy to see her and she got to meet her nephew and niece Aaron and Nicolle and see our first home.
1958 - Marriage to Gerald Cooper:
Mom and Dad were married at a Goverment Office in Japan. It took a while for mom's relatives to fully accept the marriage to dad, but they eventually came around. Dad is a very social and personable guy. Since dad was in the Navy we moved a lot and lived in many different states: Alaska, Texas, Colorado, California and even in Japan for a few years. Although I was only 5 years old I still recall memories of living in Japan. I remember vividly one time when I was standing and watching t.v., a cartoon show, I was so mezmerized by it, I went to lean on something so I put my hand out and didn't realize I just put my hand on a kerosene heater, I yelled in pain. My mom came running, she put ice on it and did other things to make me feel better. She was very good at taking care of people.
1964 - Birth of Leslie-chan on Oct. 18 at Alameda, CA.
1968 - Birth of Melody-chan on Jan. 15 at Lemoore, CA.
Life in Japan:
Sometime after Leslie was born, we moved to Japan. We met a wonderful Japanese lady who would become a very dear family friend, she was originally Les and Mel's babysitter, her name is Lulu, she is such a great person: funny, warm and caring. Watching cartoons and other shows on the TV, Melody and Les' learned to speak Japanese fluently as their first language, in addition to english. When I was 5 I started kindergarten and had to ride a school bus to a air force base to attend school. My mom would walk me to the schoolbus every day, it was over 1 mile away, I know that does not sound far, but it was a dirt road, so it got muddy in the winter and in addition my mom carried my younger sister Melody on her back since she was only about 1 year old. She never complained, she just did what was best for us, another great example of our mom's inner strength and physical strength.
1971 - Corpus-Christi Texas.
My dad was stationed here, but retired from the navy after a few years. We have a picture of my mom and her friend lulu in the front yard of our house sporting 70's style wigs. My mom looking so young and beautiful.
1973 - Boulder Colorado.
We did not live here very long as my mom did not like the cold weather. My sister and I would build small igloos in the snow and sit inside, I'm sure mom made sure we were always bundled up in warm clothes and fixed us hot meals to keep us warm on those cold days.
1974 - Santa Rosa, CA.
We were here for only a year or so. Don't recall too much. We rented a house.
1975 - Milpitas, CA.
This is the place we call home as we did not move anymore, what a relief.
Our Mom:
Mom was a great homemaker. She always kept a very tidy house. She did all of the cleaning, laundry, made our lunches, dressed us, and was a great cook. She never complained, although when we got to be in high school, we tried to do small things to help her out. I made small dishes like caseroles and even tried baking a chocolate cake once, my sister baked cookies and made pies.
Mom was primarly a homemaker for all of her life. She wanted to do something different, so she got a job at Fairchild semiconductor as a wafer fabrication inspector. Like any task my mom became very good at her job. It involved looking into a microscope to look for defects in the electronic components and to flag those that failed. Sounds kinda tedious, but she liked it. I think it was good for her to have her own money too. She was becoming Americanized.
Here were some of my mom's favorite activities:
Playing the slot machines at Tahoe.
Watching her Japanese shows on NHK, but especially watching Sumo wrestling. They had special matches for the new year.
Mom was an exceptional cook. She had so many recipes, many are written in Japanese so we will need somebody to translate them. Also she had many cookbooks. I can tell now that she studied cooking, just like a student in school studies math or english. She wanted to provide meals and saw the enjoyment she could bring to her family through her cooking. Some of our favorite recipes: Mac and Cheese, Tempura, Pasta Salad, Chicken Karaage (Japanese Chicken Nuggets), Fried Chicken, Meatloaf, Fruit Salad, Pecan Pie, Tonkatsu, Pork Curry. She always fixed a green salad with every dinner because she wanted us to have our veggies.
Her fondness of Clay Aiken, not sure why, just kidding, he came across as a nice guy, very personable young man. My mom and sister flew across the US, to Boston to see a concert of his. This was such a big deal, as my mom never did things like this. It was not in her conservative Japanese nature to jet across the country just to see an American Idol performer. But then mom had many surprises up her kimono sleeve, ha.
